A Frog is a Toad

I just need to vent, I guess. The yesterday I worried about today, is arriving tomorrow?!  How does that saying go?!
My Mom has been having problems for a year now. She fell, refused to have surgery; Her heel n' ankle didn't heal right. The woman can't even put snow boots on and is living in the land of 36" of snow.  Okay, maybe I exaggerate...I don't know.  On and Off through the years, Mr. Clean(my hubby) n' I have asked her if she was ready to sell her house. She could live with us or we could help her find a place. This  has been going on for the past 20yrs.  The time is now, bottom line....This means, fly to Maine, when school gets out and help her downsize her home. She probably has every glass jar, every plastic berry basket tucked away in the basement. She needs to get her home on the market, this spring.  She still resides, where I grew up. The street with summer cottages, has now extended up the road where she lives. A lot of people from the south, buy homes, in this area for a summer retreat.  Bottom line even though it is an old home, it is a great place to live. It is near town, near the wharf, near the post office, library, walking distance from restaurants, museums, stores and school. It is quaint and a quiet neighborhood for now. So, as I finish the FROG(furnished room over garage);It isn't going to be my space. When she does decide to move in, question is when...the Frog will be our son's bedroom. He commutes to college and works. He has wanted the FROG, for like forever. Mom will be moved, into his room.

I am trying not to feel sad, but I really feel like someone let the wind out of my sails. Maybe if I am lucky I can enjoy if for a few months.(Mom doesn't read my blog, in case you are wondering).  I know this is for the best, but i am totally worn out thinking about it. Flying home, going through everything she has tucked away and saved, for the past 45 yrs. Then trying to move her down here. It isn't official yet, but every time I approach this room, I feel it is Temporary, Oppressive, Artistic, Display=TOAD!   I know some of you have a spare closet for a craft space. I don't have this luxury; our closet is packed pretty tight; my Man has 4 uniforms, plus civilian clothes. I am thinking, I might be buying suitcases, at the thrift store and organize my crafting items, this way. I could  put tags on them, so I know what is where. Where there is a will, there is a way...right?!

Comments

DEZMOND said…
maybe you need another frog above the new frog? :)
Jules said…
I really like the suitcase idea, very inventive. As to your mother, my sympathy. In the past 4 years I have had to do AT LEAST 1 house a year. Hang in there and you know my email if you want to just blow a gasket :)
Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow
All I can offer is a big hug!!
Wanda said…
Oh Ellie, I hope things will go much smoother than you think. Love the toad acronym and you answered the question in my head (about your mom reading your post)
My thoughts and prayers with you. Being overwhelmed comes in mountains sometimes on our life journeys.
Ella, I live in a tiny cottage with hubby and two girls, you will be amazed how much stuff can be organised into rollaway plastic tubs and stacked, then covered with cloth with a vase on top to look like a hall stand.
There are more under out beds too. Things always look unmanageable - then we manage :-)
The Tin Rabbit said…
Bless! Sending up a little prayer for you and mom~ God Bless
My mom made a concentrated effort to get rid of stuff gradually over the years, downsizing as she went because she didn't want any of us girls to have to do this for her. How grateful we were. In fact, after she died, her apt was cleared out the week of the funeral by my two sisters and a couple grandchildren. On the other hand, my mother in law died 15 years ago, and her daughter is still dealing with the stuff that was left in her 4000 sq. ft. house! Speaking of space, my mother in law had a craft room, a sewing room, a genealogy room, in addition to all the regular rooms a house has. And here you are looking for just a little closet. Life is so unfair sometimes isn't it?

I'll just bet you solve your space problem in some kind of really creative and original way. And when you do, I hope you will blog about it, whether it's a frog, a toad, a fish or whatever!
I know this is a scary time for you because I was where you are only with my dad.
As hard as it will be for you try to keep in mind she is more scared than any of you. She will be wondering what she has to offer you.
Here if you need me.

Love your FROG and TOAD.
I'm sorry about your mum.......I hope I don't get into that position with my children.
I'm sure all will go well after all iot's a big up heaval all round.

Yvonne.
Sherry Blue Sky said…
Oh, I feel deflated too, I was so loving the idea of your artistic studio. Your son is going to love the independence of being out there though. Yes, your mom will be scared of making this move, and might feel like she is in the way, it will take some reassuring to let her relax and know she is welcome. I wish I could come help you downsize her belongings - I love organizing chaos (which is why the universe so kindly gave me my current life, hee hee!)

Getting her extricated from her house to yours sounds like a major undertaking. Because you will then be one of the Sandwich Generation, caring for children and parent at the same time, I URGE YOU to stake out one small space or corner SOMEWHERE in your place, for your own. Explain to hubby that your creative soul REQUIRES it. Otherwise you will feel frustrated and kind of ripped off. Life goes fast - we have to continue to do what we do all along, while we are taking care of the rest of our world.

Big changes coming, Ellie. Wowzers. Isnt the quote something about God laughing when we make plans? Who knew what you were preparing that space for? But I know you will meet the challenges, with your warrior woman spirit. Keep writing your way through it.
Unknown said…
I could never do that. Not with my Mom or my Mom-in-law. I haven't the strength to fight the paranoid or the crazy anymore than I did before we moved them into care facilities.

Some do have great Moms and then it can work.
Talli Roland said…
Wow - sending you lots of strength and positive vibes, Ella!
Hart Johnson said…
Oh, Ellie--I'm so disappointed for you. I know how excited you've been to get in there! Maybe look at it this way... eventually son will be gainfully employed and move out, so it will eventually be yours again, but I know that is hard to get excited for something and then have it not work out.
Amanda Trought said…
Hey sweetpea, my heart goes out to you, but I know where there is a will there is a way. I learnt back when my mum got dementia and out of 3 children I was the only one to take on responsibility that I needed to focus on now because I didn't know what was around the corner - new ideas, experiences! You never know when the blessing will come from an unexpected source!

Enjoy the FROG space for now if that is all its going to be, enjoy the trip to your old neighbourhood, enjoy sorting through the treasures that your mum held on to those things that will take you back down memory lane that you can share with your kids, make you laugh out loud, give you ideas which will spark your creativity.

Life throws us many lessons we can learn from each situation that can take us to the next, the strengh we can reach down to to enable us to pick ourselves

As we continue to enjoy our 'now' seeing the wonderful insights they bring, tomorrow will take care of itself. Love you! Stay blessed and heres a special (*hug*) all the way from the UK
LTM said…
oh, honey. ((hug)) You and I are almost in the same boat, except I'm moving US. That Maine home sounds divine... too bad you have to sell it! And I'm sorry you're losing your space. I work at a desk in my bedroom, so you and I are in the same boat there as well. :o| I guess, try to think of it as time with your mom you'll never have again. Or something.

I love the little frogs in your picture~ :o) <3
Ella said…
Leigh-Thank-you; I like your take on the view~
It has borrowed time, but what doesn't. I need to make the most of it, when I can! I wish I had a desk in my bedroom. xXx

Amanda-Thank you for the reminder of returning to my roots. I will enjoy traveling down memory lane for the most part. My Mom just has kept so much...
I know we all have lessons, just this one will be major, doable, but big~ Thank you for your insight! xXx I love seeing through your eyes~

Hart-Thanks, I can enjoy it for awhile! It isn't for sure, yet. BUT, every time we talk, I know it is coming. Something is going to happen and this is her best choice. She has trouble walking now from the fall, so getting around is difficult, snow doesn't help. Thanks for your kind thoughts~xXx

Talli-Thank you, I needed that ;-D

Ciss B-I understand where you are coming from; It won't be easy, but what is?! Thanks for sharing @>---

Sherry-Every creative endeavor already feels like a battle. My husband wishes I would do something else. They all say, Just do it, but when it comes to my time, they always find a way to need something. I'm trying not to be discouraged, but I am a bit. Trying to write will be difficult. Mom likes to talk; I will have to find a way to push through all the barriers, including my own, self doubt. Thank you so much, xXx

Yvonne-Thank you; It should of happened years ago. I guess with all the moving we have done, it probably made it difficult, but we have lived here going on 9yrs. She wouldn't down size, when we tried before. It is a really old home and hard to heat. xXx

Mary-Thank you for your wisdom; We do have to remember to see both sides...Thank you @>---
Ella said…
Karen G-Thanks for sharing; Yes, life is odd like that. I will have to post, about my new space and rename it ;-D

Tin Rabbit-Thank you so much, I so appreciate your kindness @>---

Charmaine-I agree, we do find a way! I have done that before, lol. It was a huge plastic bin...tucked in a corner. Thank you! @>---

Queen Bee-YOU are so right, my is a mountain of vintage clothing, magazines, and recycled material! Thank you! @>---

Wanda-Thank you; I hope you are right @>--- :)

Thanks Colette-xXx

Jules-Thank you, I hope I don't blow one, but I probably will before it is all over. xXx

Dezmond-No silly, I need an elephant ;-D
My Mom collects them I wonder how many will follow her here?!