Grace in the Garden

Over in the Garden, Grace prompted us to write a form I had not heard of.  I was intrigued. I started my poem, but life got in the way.  My hubby wanted to take the boat out. I do not go very often, he will leave at 5am and come home by 1-2 pm looking like a Lobster.  I normally go when the kids go tubing-but they were working.   Thankfully the Captain made some finally checks before we left. Smoke rolling out of the battery is never a good sign.  And neither is it fun to have brakes over heat in a trailer and smell that horrible acrid smell.  Fun, did happen, when we took our hound out in the boat. He thought geese might be hopeful rabbits.  We actually have a store we pull into along Intercoastal  highway, to allow our dog to visit grass and we can stretch our sea legs.  I bought cold old fashioned Rootbeer and old fashion penny candy.  It is more like nickle and dime, now. 

Grace shared this form:

We are going to tackle a nine-line poem, called the rictameter.   The first 5 lines are very similar to a cinquain.   The rictameter pattern of syllables per line goes like this:  2,4,6,8,10,8,6,4,2.    Also, the first and last lines must be the same.

History of the Rictameter:
Created in the early 1990s by two cousins, Jason D. Wilkins and Richard W. Lunsford, Jr., for a poetry contest that was held as a weekly practice of their self-invented order, The Brotherhood of the Amarantos Mystery. The order was inspired by the Robin Williams movie Dead Poets Society.
The first examples of the rictameter form to be made public were submissions made by Jason Wilkins to the website www.shadowpoetry.com in 2000. 
 
 

Satin
As your lips are
Pressed to mine as velvet
Soft and full with rounded sweetness
Two gentle petals alive with the night
Misted in the summer beauty
Of rains that shower love
'Pon your lips of
Satin  



Copyright © 2000 Jason Wilkins
 
 
 
What a pretty form and to think this was developed so currently, by two cousins, who are part of a mysterious order-how fun! 



 * My daughter and her boyfriend trying to hang on. My husband had just spun them around.  Yes, he was doing doughnuts in a bass boat!



Fishtail    
 legs spinning air
Swan song signals enough
water kissed confetti falls 
Flamenco dance prefers flamingo stance
Crane stretches on sugared shore
perpendicular hold
sailboat lens view
Fishtail 

© Ellen Wilson






Teen peacocks hanging out in a pick-up truck.  The gorgeous male is hidden. 

 

Gossipy
teens hanging out
 pick up dreams of escape
maybe she will drive us to the wild blue wonder
what kind of bird is she with a long zoom nose
Raven hair and a clicking tongue
oh, she is wearing red-Blue's favorite
ruffled feathers
Gossipy


© Ellen Wilson





This is Blue, yes that is his name.  I frequent the Farmer's Market and the owner was telling me about her peacocks.  He is gorgeous, and yes his favorite color is Red.   She told me they were all teens and terrible acting.  I discovered them sitting in the back of a pick-up truck.  Blue is hidden, you can see his head to the right of the orange cone.  My daughter and I were laughing so hard trying to get them to move.  I took a bunch of photos-lots of clicking noise.  They kept tilting their heads and staring at us.  I bet they wondered what kind of birds were we, in a blue Honda wearing red.  lol 


 


Comments

Good job on the poem.
That last shot is excellent!
And did you avoid becoming a lobster?
Susan said…
Wow! Thank you for taking us with you on such a happy life filled day. The glimpse into your life was fun, and all the mood and tone galloped into your poetry. Bravo.
Johanna Garth said…
I love both the form and both your attempts :)
kaykuala said…
My Ella, what a day out! Family fun can never be compared to anything else. Beautiful poetry, a host of them and beautiful pics. Thanks for sharing Ma'am!

Hank
Grace said…
The fishtail poem is full of fun and action ~ Those peacocks are gorgeous especially Blue ~ Love the pictures too Ella ~
Kerry O'Connor said…
I love the peacocks - and the common thread in both your poems - teens having fun!
Mary said…
I enjoyed both poems. Sure looks like your daughter and bf were having a good time. And what BEAUTIFUL peacocks.
Morgan said…
So lovely, Ella! <3 <3 <3
Peggy said…
Both of these came out very well, Ella. I like this form. The peacocks are funny aren't they? A pretty large naturalized flock of them lived in my husband's growing up neighborhood in Pasadena. So fun to see those males try to learn how to strut!
L. Diane Wolfe said…
I've never heard of that style of poetry.

Lovely peacock photos. I would've taken dozens of pictures.
M Pax said…
That form would give me a panic attack. You, as always, wrote to it beautifully. And what great inspiration. Looks like you had a great day on the water.
Kay L. Davies said…
Oh, what fun you had with the rictameter form, Ella. And your photos are such fun, too. I love the teenage peacocks.
My favorite line in your poems was:
"Flamenco dance prefers flamingo stance" because I once saw some trained flamingos performing and they were wonderful.
Luv, K
Yolanda Renée said…
I really need to take a class on poetry, I know nothing - absolutely nothing about it. (Although, I like to pretend I do :))

A day like that definitely should be celebrated in poetry, which you did beautifully.
Sherry Blue Sky said…
So much fun, the poems and the photos. I love Blue.
Laura said…
absolutely delightful Ella!
Renee said…
Thanks for the fun day trip! Loved the poems.
Ella said…
Hi Renee-It was a trip alright, lol!
;D Thank you, hope you are doing well~

Laura-Thank you! It was fun to think of teens, for this method of poetry!

Sherry-I love Blue, too ;D
Thank you~

Yolanda-lol, I'm learning! It is just like writing-a lot to take in.
Thank you~ We had fun-I hope to visit Blue tomorrow ;D lol
Thank you~

Kay-Oh, how exciting! I think I saw some at Disney-I always wanted to try to dance like that, lol ;D
Peacock style-tee,hee

MPax-When I read the poetry challenges-I sometimes think what?!
Then I have another cup of coffee or tea, do some yoga and give it a go! lol I know-right! It was beautiful day to be on the water ;D
Thank you Mary!

L.Diane-I did! Blue still wouldn't strut his stuff. I won't give up...I found out he loves dog food ;D I'm going back in stealth mode and try again! Thank you~

Peggy-lol, it is fun! I made all kinds of noises trying to get them to be curious enough to move. No luck...but my daughter and I had a lot of laughs. She showed them the Cheese-It box-it is red and one started making noises. Thank you~

Morgan-Thank you so much @>-------

Mary-Yes,it has been a teen week alright. Colorguard performance which I will share, National Honor Society induction, Chorus performance, and more! lol
Thank you~

Kerry-Me, too! I know right ;D

Grace-Yes, actually some of the moves are from Synchronized swimming. I had fun-great challenge! Thank you~ :D

Hank-Thank you! Yes, it brightened my world on many levels ;D lol

Johanna-It is fun to image a movie created this union, that created this form! ;D lol Thank you~

Susan-I so happy you didn't saw swam, lol ;D You are kind! Thank you~

Alex-Thank you! :D I did avoid becoming a lobstah, lol. I rarely burn-I think it is the Indian in me, but I can go on the war path and turn red when the family leaves me with all the dishes!
Tammy Theriault said…
i remember having to do these in school!! great pics and poems.
Ella, both are lovely examples of rictameter. I loved the line in the first: "water kissed confetti falls," the confetti being the spray that rises up like magic. When there's enough mist, you can see a rainbow.

You all have so much fun. I am happy for your family. These were both quality writing, and I thank you. Amy
Shelly said…
What fabulous fun poems for such an incredible day.

Hugs and chocolate,
Shelly
Ella said…
Hi Shelly-Thank you! It was fun ;D
Hugs and Chocolate to you~

Amy-I had fun with these! ;D Yes, I love that magic, too~ Thank you Amy!

Tammy-Thank you! I missed this form, but I really do like it~ I bet yours were great :D
Jinksy said…
From smooth satin to blue, unruffled feathers - what a great journey! LOL
DEZMOND said…
Grace always has the most unusual forms of poems. very creative!
Ella said…
Hi Dezzy-Yes, she does :D Thank you~

Jinksy-lol, I love how you expressed it-from one blue to another. ;D
You are clever @>---------
Anonymous said…
These are all fantastic

The first one is so sensual

The second one has such a playful quality and is a delight to read

The 3rd one is my favorite I just the love the imagery