Wednesday, April 27, 2016

W is for Worry

W is for Worry. 


I have a tendency from my mom to project the outcome of any endeavor.   I believe my mother uses it as a coping mechanism.  This way she is  prepared for the worst outcome.  It saddens me to think of all the time and emotion wasted on worry.  I do it, too. 

 My daughter is in college and  called the other day telling me about this dreaded project with a partner.   "What if.... and what if so n' so doesn't do his half of the project?"    "We are using google doc and if he doesn't do his work-I will have to."  


"YOU are projecting the worst outcome." 
The project hadn't started-yet, but my girl was already in a sea of turmoil.  
The sea of worry building on a rogue wave that may not appear.


I reminded her,  "You are wasting time-none of this may happen." "You could be getting your other work done, laughing, or exercising instead of worrying.  Go, do something you enJOY-for a few minutes.
Sad thing is-it did happen.  
Her partner wouldn't text her back, didn't do his work and left her with  the burden of  finishing the project, but both parties had to turn in their own references for the work, quoted research and individual assignments.   The professor emailed my daughter and knows-what is going on. 

Worry is like the common cold-there is no cure.  

We can visualize and use small escapes to downsize our anxiety-hobbies we enjoy, music, writing, movement-like walking.  

Drumming helps me.  Funny thing is I don't own a drum.  So, I pound and tap what I have around me.  It puts me into the now, I get to pound the heck out of something,  and no one gets hurt.  


Do we need a medicine cabinet shelf with ideas for anxiety and worry?  Nah,  but maybe we can make list of distractions that can help us worry less-like those over the counter meds we get when we are fighting a cold: cough drops, tissues, nasal spray and cough syrup.

How do you manage worry? 







9 comments:

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

Most of what we worry about isn't within our control anyway, which makes it even more useless to worry about it.

Ella said...

Hi Alex-Yes, so true~ We can overcome some of it-with passion and energy. Useless-says it all! Thank you, for stopping by~

Karen S. said...

Worry not, waste not, what will be will be, so remember that from my childhood!

Stephanie Faris said...

They say meditation helps us learn to control our thoughts, but I haven't ever had it do anything more than make me sleepy! I wish we could somehow reprogram our brains. Most of the things we worry about never happen. What is it they say? Worrying doesn't empty tomorrow of its troubles--it just empties today of its strength.

kaykuala said...

Non-completion is always accompanied by worries. Procrastination is the evil partner.Finishing a project fast is the answer! Rightly so Ella!

Hank

Sherry Blue Sky said...

When one is as old as I am, one doesnt worry - too tired! LOL. Resignation takes the place of worry. Smiles. I am glad that teacher could see what had happened, your daughter will get extra marks, I'll bet.

Ella said...

Hi Sherry! She has another group project. I know there will be more worry-it is part of life. I do think though we need to some how manage it better~ She is doing yoga and I hope this helps~ Thank you, for sharing!

Hank-Yes, I am in the middle of making a wedding bouquet and well, there has been worry. Can I bring it? I don't make wedding bouquets, but after navigating my fear I finally faced the challenge. So, far so good! Thanks Hank for stopping by~ Yes sometimes it really does help!

Stephanie-I do think a meditation practice could help, but to try it when worry n' panic is swirling-I am not sure. I know it doesn't work for me, when the anxiety waves start rolling in. I have to distance myself and distract my thoughts-laughter helps me most. Thanks for sharing. Meditation I believe is like exercise and you can get better with time and patience. It takes time to learn to flex those mind muscles and overcome all the random thought bubbles~. Thank-you for sharing!

Karen S-Yes! I have heard this, too. It probably was my grandmother who said this wisdom. A lot of truth in those words~
Thank you, for sharing!

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

I don't have a good way to handle it. Thank you for this post. I'm working on it. Your writing is so playful and comforting. I'm less worried at the moment. Maybe one of my strategies for dealing with worry will be: Visit Ella's Edge. I've been negligent and I've been missing out. =)

Ella said...

Robyn-You cracked me up! I need to laugh-more. My new remedy will be visit you~ You are sweet-thank you! Yes, we all need more hugs, chocolate and laughter in our worlds~
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